This is the last Bemused Bride Thursday 13, can you believe it? To commemorate less than TWO DAYS LEFT, I will let you know what I’ve learned in the last little bit.
1. When someone offers to help, let them. Seriously. Give them a job! Extra hands are so absolutely fabulous. Even something small like writing place cards (Thank you Heather!) or picking up a cake (Thank you Angela!)… if someone else can take care of it for you, more the better.
2. But don’t overload the same folks. Take for instance, my insane organza flower project. Cutting and burning and sewing 1,000 fleurs means that my dearest Mom and Emily did NOT get asked to do other major projects. Me thinks their heads would have exploded! (Of course, my lovely Marm is coordinating the beauty, so she is totally doing another major project. THANKS MOM!)
3. Nail down the big things, the rest will fall into place. Despite Mr. T’s protests that I was starting things too early, the fact that we had our ceremony and reception sites, photographer and caterer lined up 6-8 months in advance saved my sanity. No matter what, I knew there would be a fabulous place with good food and great photography. Knowing that made all the future decisions much easier.
4. Start the program early. Instead of starting my program (a whole 1.5 days before the ceremony), I’m blogging. I will get to it shortly and regret that I didn’t start designing last week. Ahhhh!
5. Make lists. And lists of lists. And carry the lists around. I find list making and item crossing especially cathartic. To increase feelings of productivity, write down things you’ve already done and cross them off immediately. Really, it works.
6. Take a chill pill. Although I “didn’t have time” to see Music Circus on Tuesday or go to the fair Wednesday or see my trainer dude or have sushi, I did. And I still have my sanity despite the now-shrinking (thank God) to-do list. Pencil in some relaxation time amidst the crazy, you’ll be glad you did.
7. Take the whole damn week off. If you’re doing DIY crazy like me, take the whole week off if you can. I seriously regret working Monday and Tuesday, not even counting the fact that I got my arse canned.
8. Plan for monkey wrenches. Make allowances for family trauma drama or work drama (see above) or for something to go wrong wedding-wise. Acknowledge the ick, spend a bit of emotional energy on it, and then let. it. go. Chances are you won’t remember the extra charge for the party rentals or the 7,000 phone calls from your grandfather who keeps asking if he’s still invited to the wedding. (No, Lug, you haven’t been cut from the list!)
9. Sleep. I’m writing this more as a prescription for myself. Big bags do not a beautiful bride make. Sleeeeeppppppp. Make someone put your buns to bed. Seriously, folding and stuffing can wait till the morn.
10. Buddy up. If at all possible, run errands with a good friend or close family member. Bonus points if you have a Shannon with whom you share half a brain. Decision making, strategizing and general fun greatly increase when you’re erranding with a friend.
11. Take Advil before the waxing. This may be TMI, but I went from Sasquatch to silky smooth by way of hot wax today. They weren’t kidding when they advise you to take a pain reliever beforehand. OUCH. (Drinks after help too though.)
12. Be nice. Whilst wrapping presents for me today, Shannon watched Bridezillas on cable. Whoa. I cannot imagine screeching and whining and screaming, and yet clearly there are women on TV who do just that, a lot. I may not be screeching, but I have noticed an increase in snappiness and sarcasm, just a bit. And so I say (mostly to myself), just be nice and see how much nicer everyone else is, too.
13. Eyes on the prize. It sounds mondo-cliche, but remember what all the crazy prepping and planning and spending is for… marrying your best friend. If the food sucks and the music stops and my dress rips and the guests don’t show… it doesn’t actually matter because at the end of the day, I will be hitched to my favorite person on the planet. Yay!