Recently, I made a new friend. A lovely, intriguing new friend. At some point, however, I realized the new friend had become a distraction. And then I wondered about the other distractions that I’ve met. Whether people, projects, engaging books, hobbies, or homework, I wonder about the distractions that may separate me from my most important relationships. And then I thought about marriage. I’m new to this game, clearly, but I’m keenly aware of the trouble that distractions can present in an intimate relationship. Career, family, children, all of my aforementioned distractions… how do they serve to interrupt or complicate a healthy marriage?
To me, marriage is a sacred covenant. Although I dressed our wedding up with humor, irreverent music and airplanes, the fact that I am now forever bonded to T is something I take extraordinarily seriously. By exchanging rings, we exchanged hearts. I literally feel as if his heart is in my hands. When I hurt him, even inadvertently, it’s like I can feel his heart’s pain.
Although my religion classes are now years away from me, I remember some text about “guarding your heart” from the impure things in this world. I think the principle is also the same for marriage. Only, you’re not just guarding your own heart, you’re guarding your partner’s as well.
With that, I will just say for my married friends and those thinking of becoming married friends, guard your hearts. All of ’em.