The Ceiling Fan-iversary: Musings on a decade of marriage
Around our first anniversary, I remember joking about how relieved I was to discover that I actually liked being married to Mr. …
The World’s Biggest T-Rex, as WWII Airplanes
Mr. T, looking over from his computer: “Did you hear, they found the bones of a 20,000 pound T-Rex?” Me, looking over …
‘You’re a complete loser’ and other terms of endearment
Mr. T, fist held aloft over an open palm: “Which one do you really want?” Me, hands mirroring his: “Both.” T: “Well, …
I’ll see your lipids and raise you a PSA
What follows is a rendition of an actual conversation this morning. Numbers have been fabricated to protect the innocent. Mr. T: “Okay, …
Love: If you’re happy and you know it
“Aren’t you happy that I’m happy you’re home?” “Oh yeah. I’m happy,” Mr. T deadpans, without looking away from his computer screen. …
A deal with the devil and Christmas is collateral
The fate of Christmas rests on my thighs. Or rather, my ability to make them smaller. You see, I struck a deal …
Anniversary the fifth
We’d just parked by the fuel pumps after an hour of Bonanza flight training. We’d gone out to get me comfortable in …
I’ve got to hide the big brains somewhere, right?
My classmates and I were in the elevator after seminar one evening, for some reason talking about what body part we would …
A man who makes me laugh
I was rinsing shampoo when Mr. T came into the bathroom, looking pleased as punch. I glanced at him and he pointed …
Is tone deafness mind over matter? My Halloween costume is on the line.
Any ideas on how to make a giant slug costume? “I’m watching you WazOWski,” I said while piling broccoli onto our plates. …